It's one of the worst pieces of news a woman can hear. Susan Quilliam advises on how you can support, understand and help a friend with breast cancer

Every year in Britain, 38,000 women develop breast cancer. That's one in twelve. Unfortunately the chances are high that at some point in the future, someone you know will develop the disease.

Coping with the news
Expect shock. Even if your friend has suspected the worst, she will still be in shock. She'll need time to cry, feel angry and even worry that it might have been a mistaken diagnosis.

Learn to listen. The most important thing you have to offer your friend is the ability to listen. Let her talk, encourage with nods and smiles, attempt to understand. If you can do this, in time she'll be able to summon her own strength in order to cope.

Keep positive without denial. Don't be a prophet of doom - cancer is not the death sentence it used to be and large numbers of people who develop the disease get cured. On the other hand, don't dismiss your friend's concerns - she needs to be taken seriously.

Take your time. You and your friend don't have to rush into anything - a couple of days' wait will not lead to her dying. It may be worth making the space for her to get her emotions together, before taking further medical advice.

Supporting during treatment
Gather information. One of the most helpful things you can do is gather information for your friend. She may well be feeling too confused and shocked to do it herself. But don't make that an excuse to give advice - just be a conduit of facts and let her think about those facts for herself.

Go along for consultations. Having someone come to appointments can be enormously helpful. Be prepared to take notes, take a list of questions and be there to help and support her. Don't try to speak on behalf of your friend - and if the news is bad, don't take up the attention with your own grief or fear.

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Supporting a friend through breast cancer